Subtitles

Posted by Matthew McEwen

Watching bootleg movies is a two-tiered enjoyment as you never know the quality or hidden surprises half way through a movie: strangers talking in the seats in front, laughing that is delayed because of it takes Asian audiences time to read the subtitles, sudden scrolling of messages of warning (for awards purposes only) , or cuts to black and white, but the real fun is the subtitles which can range from bad translations to having absolutely nothing to do with the action. U-571 subtitles began at the titles with a conversation someone was having on the phone
"hey!" "how's it going?" "Yeah, I'm going out tonight" "where's everyone at?" ... I left it on as long as I could stand it but always wondered where it went. I just became too distracting. Another of my favorites is The Four Feathers where "whore house" was subtitled as "waffle house". Tonight we watched the Forbidden Kingdom and I jotted a few down for amusement purposes ... I'll have to bring some home this summer to enjoy.

Jackie Chan and Jet Li are fighting and one of them busts out the praying mantis
"Praying mantis? Good for killing bugs but not tigers."
subtitles say:
"Religious blankets? Good bugs of hunting. nontigers"

After taking a beating the kid states:
"I've had enough"
subtitles:
"I'm already full up"

Sometimes there is meaning making in the words:
"she was assassinated by an arrow from the warlords bow"
becomes:
"mother that assassinated by the shoots with the arrow of the arc of the general"

Sometimes I think they just can't figure it out:
"kill them"
becomes
"mjtenlios"